009: Time of fairies and giants

A particular story of a manga Nanatsu no Taizai struck me. One where Diane the giant was playing with King the fairy. Just a game of tag or as we call in Singapore "catching". They had a lot of fun. A few days passed and they went back to village of humans encountering an old man they thought had met a few days ago. Thanking him for his help with the medicine he gave Diane. The man was a bit puzzled as this was the first time meeting the pair. Then he realise they were referring to his grandfather which often talked about a fairy and a giant he met a long time ago.

What was moments for fairies and giants was 1 or 2 hundred years. Relatable. It's has been more 10years since I moved to Italy. Almost 10years since I met Roby my husband. It all seem like yesterday. Memories of the past seem to compress itself.

I'm not sure if i have changed much. Certainly I don't feel any different mentally. After all this time I'm still trying to find my way, at least that hasn't change. The biggest change is accepting my limits and working within those limits. Repetition and time taught me that.

#sliceoflife #NanatsuNoTaizai #Diane #King #fairies #giants #catching #tag #human #repetition #time #limits

008: Lost childhood

In the final fight scene Reigen san tells Mob to run away. I know a lot of you are not anime fans so you might have missed this very important scene. Reigen san is a con man and uses Mob to exorcise spirits and the like, make a lot of money in the process. Mob is a gifted child with super psychic powers therefore is often forced into a situation where he has to deal unpleasantness. As you know a lot of this "fighting" animes ends off with a big show down with the final boss. This is a bit different.

Reigen san doesn't have any psychic ability. He's only talent is persuasion. Run away and let the adult handle this. That was his message. So Reigen san fought on his behalf… Go watch watch the series if you want to know what happened before and after. lol I love this scene.

Indeed this is rare in most of the anime the gifted child always ends up having to do the un-childlike thing of fighting horrible evil monsters/ people/ situations. What's the worst is a lot of real children in real situations like this. (I speak of the situation in Singapore when I am most familiar with.) Child suicides are not rare. My friend SP was recounting of an article in the papers of a primary 5 child. Even if the parents are not ambitious or loving, the pressure to perform in school is immense. The friend's daughter who is doing her PSLE this year typically has ballet, piano and violin lesson outside of the school curriculum. Her daughter chooses all the extras not her mom. If I was her I personally wouldn't.

I tried a math question posted by another friend in another whatsapp group in this article about Singapore in the top 3 countries for math education. Needless to say it was too difficult for me. Pretty challenging being a parent in Singapore. It's hard for adults/parents to hold their own in the school syllabus.

A common mentality is to push the child to the limit especially if they show some promise. Studying is not fun, not in my time and certainly in it's current form in Singapore from what I gather. As a student you HAVE to study if not you will no future. It's still haunting after all this while. I'm not very smart, I tried really hard but results didn't reflect that. My mom didn't really push me at all.

This kind of competitive spirit at a young age just cause a kind of burnout in me. So I'm glad I'm not in their position. This is probably the cause of my laidback attitude.

So it surprises me that here in Italy the attitude towards learning is completely different. My nephew on Roby's side of the family speaks perfectly formed sentences at age3. If you have tackled Italian verbs and words it's no walk in the park. His parents decided not to push him too much so he won't lose interest when enrols in school. They let him play as he likes so he could discover his own interest. Discovering his personality through play. School work & future is a small part of this.

Yeah it's strange for me. Work is overrides everything when I was growing up in Singapore and still the case today. When my parent were away for work it was ok, because it was important. When kids study without any breaks, it's for their future, so it was accepted. So the present gets ignored for the sake of the future. Childhood gets sacrificed for the future. The precious time don't ever come back.

I don't think it's right to ignore the future career opportunities. The children shouldn't have to feel that they have to deal with everything by themselves, just because their parents are too busy working. Be a hero to your child. And good luck.

(ps. This issue has been bothering me for some time now. It's not really my expertise but I feel I have to get if off my chest so I'm writing it in this post.)

#Singapore #sliceoflife #PyschoMob100 #Reigen #exorcisespirits #psychicability #unchildlikething #unpleasantness #PSLE #top3math #schoolcurriculum #laidback #burnout #Italianverbs #future #play #childhood #futurecareeropportunities #everythingbythemselves

007: Coming of age

1 of many lakes at the Botanic Gardens

One morning while I going about my chores I passed the bathroom mirror and spotted a blood on my right eye. I went into a panic. There was no pain or discomfort, just a blotch where the blood had spread. I went for an eye checked later in the week. After going through a very thorough test they did not find anything abnormal. My blood pressure was normal too. The doctor surmised that there was a point when the blood pressure shot up that that broke 1 of the blood vessels. It would be a problem if it was repeated.

My body is starting to fail me…nooooo. Health wise I'm lucky not to have a lot of problems. People of my age, back ache, insomnia. I'm 3 years short of 50. The more serious ones are stroke, cancer. 2 of my contemporaries have passed on because of cancer. Both of them are Singaporeans.

This is the future. Not very rosy. Not bright and shining. When I see an older person, I see the future. Not the sleek architecture, not the new born baby. They try desperately to sell me this idea, but I'm not buying it. The future is when your body and mind fails you. The future is when you fight back. You start to pick a new diet. Maybe less salt. You go organic. Low cholesterol foods. You pick up jogging or a new sport maybe.

In my last trip to Singapore, out of boredom I decided to go to Botanic Gardens in the morning. I did this for week. 6am in morning I took the MRT 2 stops to the Botanic gardens. It was all dark but there people working at BG. It was the magic hour. The whole place was alive. There wasn't the scorching sun. Nor the noisy groups of family. Nor tourists. Just groups of senior citizens doing exercises with the radio on. People doing aerobics or qigong. Joggers. Maids walking the dogs. Small groups of walking mostly older people. A lot of workers sweeping the endless amount of leaves. Wow.

After an hour of walking I was dazed and confused. I'm at my limit. Google maps showed me to exit. Around 8.30am the scene changes. The groups of senior citizens done with their morning exercises, pack up and stop to have a chat. Then a steady stream of commuters, students walking to and from the exit, some with packed breakfast and others eating.

This is the senior citizen lifestyle. I was always so prejudiced against this before. I mean waking up at 6am out of your own free will. Are you out of your mind? That's what I thought. It was an eye opener. The place was the same but it was transformed.

It doesn't mean your problems would go away. But if you keep your mind open, new experiences do come your way even if you grow old.

#sliceoflife #bloodinmyeye #bloodpressure #panic #health #future #notrosy #Singapore #BotanicGardens #stroke #cancer #passedon #olderperson #organic #lowcholesterol #jogging #MRT #dark #workerssweeping #dazedandconfused #GoogleMaps #anopenmind #newexperiences

006: Romance and Plumbing

wild flowers from our garden

Roby is a big fan of Netflix. Dinner involves switching on the projector, AppleTv and watching a series. A few days ago was 13 reasons why a story that revolves around a suicide of a teenage girl. (Spoiler alert; cover your eyes for until the end of the paragraph) Near the end of series, she dies in the bathtub, leaving the water on for dramatic effect. The water overflows spilling on the floor.

Roby turns to me (in Italian but for convenience I wrote it in English) "Why do they do it all the time?" Referring to the water overflowing and not the actual death. "At least turn off the water… she gonna be discovered in no time" jeezz…

We recently suffered that exact problem some months when we first moved in. We had a blocked drainage pipe in the shower. Everytime we shower there was a risk of flooding the bathroom and wetting the bed. Which happened once. The standard Italian bathrooms unlike Singaporean ones are not fitted with drainage on the floor outside. Therefore it can cope with a situation like flooding. Asian toilets are typical scrubbed down by spraying water liberally with a hose (back in the day). Italian style of cleaning is like cleaning the rest of the house with a mop or something similar.

Re-wind a few weeks back in another film in another woman dying (The Fountain). Another bathtub overflowing. This was when the Hugh Jackman character got into the tub to join his wife at the start of the love scene. "He's doing it because he doesn't have to clean up the toilet himself. Some poor intern probably mop up the mess he created." Then I added "There's no drainage in the toilet. That's the problem! All toilets need drainage system to avoid this problem in the future."

This is our romance after almost 7 years of marriage. Leave your stereotypical idea of romance at the door. This is us in the present.

#afterdinnerroutine #sliceoflife #Netflix #AppleTv #tvseries #suicideofteenagegirl #bathtub #leavingthewateron #floodingthetoilet #drainage #italianbathrooms #TheFountain #marriage #romance #present

005: Roby's & Spillo's couch politics

We got ourselves a 2seater couch that with an automatic extendable footrest (¬ ‿ ¬) last october. How did we survive all these years of marriage without one?! Well this is more Roby’s idea. I’m more of a stool person probably because of my Asian habits… maybe… Back at my parents’ place that’s where i spend my time in front of the coffee table snacking on fruits and watching Korean drama.

Anyway both Roby and Spillo spend more time on the couch than I do! No surprise of course. I’ll in charge of clearing up the kitchen and nearly all the chores.

A normal after dinner routine would be: Spillo would park himself on the left seat which Roby’s side before we finish eating. He wouldn’t budge when Roby takes a seat, so than he sits on my side. When I’m done eating I drop a treat on his bowl and he slowly gets up to eat that. Then we would take our respective places Spillo in the middle, normally head on Roby’s lap. lol

When I was away in Singapore Spillo would sleep on the 1st floor. The kitchen/ living room is on the 2nd floor and Roby’s studio/office on the ground floor. After work at night Roby would go to the couch in the living room. The moment Roby gets up from his chair. Spillo would race up to the couch before him to take the left seat. Spillo would look up at Roby when he steps in the kitchen “oh what are you waiting for”

#sliceoflife #verona #italy #couchpolitics #spillo #Roby #chores #leftseat #footrest #stoolperson #Asianhabits #snacking #Koreandrama #afterdinnerroutine

004: Dog training applied to humans

treats for not barking at people lol

We started dog training ever since we had Spillo last december. It’s a pretty intense session that we are still undergoing. This started me thinking if this could be applied to humans as well. Think about that annoying person in the workplace, how do you make them nicer or behaving in the way that you want.

Nobody likes to be told what to do, how they should do it or they should behave. Yet we (human beings in general) freely offer their “advice” to one another and in this case another species …dog your so-called best friend. I see this as man’s arrogance towards another being other than himself.

For example the issue of barking. Dogs barks. That’s the most natural doggy behaviour. He is expressing himself, when he is scared he barks. When he doesn’t like something he barks. When he is angry he barks. When he playful he barks. Unfortunately this behaviour is not acceptable on your daily walks.

Spillo used to bark at people, especially old folks with walking sticks, kids, negro women and joggers. You can’t get any more politically incorrect than that. I can’t tell you how times he nearly gave old folks a heart attack barking at them out of the blue. Or kids crying when he lunge at them. 

After months of positive reinforcement Spillo has come to associate people with biscuits. Every time we pass someone on the street, he turns to look at me as if to say “well… where’s my biscuit? …well come on… hurry up and give me my biscuit”

I don’t know how it could be applied to people. Food doesn’t work on all people (but it works on me). If you could apply the techniques to make people behave the way that you want to that would be nice. What I have learned from dog training is more than Spillo. I would love to elaborate on this in future post.

#dogtraining #humantraining #scared #barking #walks #oldpeople #joggers #kids #anotherspecies #advice

003: Cat with many masters

Since a few years ago I reconnected with an old friend D. She’s quite the sociable type, unlike me, it’s impossible to keep track of the people she knew. Then I remembered a theory I had of her. I called her a food magnet ie. she seem to be receiving food from various random people.

This was years ago. She would buy lunch consisting of rice with a few dishes. Often they would give her enough for dinner. Sometimes even some snacks on the side without extra charge. The best story was the free ice cream. Once she was given all flavours of ice cream to taste from an ice cream shop. Free of course. So much that she wanted to puke at the end of it but kept smiling despite of that. What envy! I mean who is not a fan of free food.

I’ve received free food too. In the 90’s the gallery openings (in singapore) had refreshments with a lot of wine to go around. That was a lot of fun. It was different because it was free to everyone. 

No fair! Why her and not me. Just the other day it happened again. We was at a coffee shop and she arrived before us. Free toast. No charge. It’s like magic.

Then I finally put this mystery to rest after 20 over years.

This situation is not new. We see it in another context. There was a fat stray cat Mozzarella outside the old apartment where we used to stay. He ate whatever food you gave it. He meows when necessary. But he was really antisocial with me and Roby. Around dinner time he would appear at the usual spot. At other times he is probably fed somewhere else by someone else. There’s the neighbour that brings food to him every evening. Sometimes it would be half eaten. Mozzarella is a fat cat. I’m certain he has other masters around the neighbourhood.

This is pretty normal with cats. Even some house cats do that. My friend D is just like that. Random people offering her food. Each not knowing the existence of the other. But why? That happens before the food is offered. She’s charming and talks to them about things. There is an exchange… conversation. In return and in appreciation of this act of humanness they give her food. Simple!

Simple for her, not simple for me. Let’s try harder for free grub ٩(๑`^´๑)۶

 #sliceoflife #verona #italy #singapore #freefood #cats #catwithmanymasters #friend #straycats #humanness #antisocialcat #nocharge